Harmony is My Life - Continued

Harmony is My Life

Friday, Sept. 25, 2015

Arguing is not one of my strengths. In fact, I participated in a strength-finder survey two years ago, and one of my five strengths was the opposite--harmony. The test defines that trait as pertaining to a person who avoids conflict and prefers that everyone get along. Often times when there is a disagreement, I ask myself, “What is the point?” Everywhere people are fighting over silly things. Instead of going back and forth, dragging out a discussion, and going nowhere with it, I think people should look for common ground. As a practical person, I believe that pointless squabbles are a waste of time. However, there are aspects of my life where I do insert myself into arguments.

At home, I argue with my brother about who gets to use the car and when. This argument happened more frequently when he first got his drivers license, but now we have figured out a system. We tell each other when we want to use the car, and if there is a conflict then we try to work it out. Looking back, we made the fights over the car much more dramatic than they needed to be. Clearly, simply coming up with a plan is a better way to approach that situation. Otherwise, my sibling and I do not verbally or physically fight very much.

With my friends from home, I argue with them over trivial things, but I like to be right so I continue the argument even when the other person tries to back off. One time, my friend and I went back and forth over the ingredients in mayonnaise. She thought it is made with dairy and I said eggs. To know for sure, I looked it up to find the correct answer. I do this frequently when I do not know the answer to something, and once I find it, I like to share it with people. By this point, my friend had given up on the argument, so I count that as a win for me. And, I was right. I like to argue when I am certain that I know what I am talking about.

At SLU, I have been encouraged to form arguments more than when I was in high school. In my Honors Crossroads class, we have discussions about healthcare in class and on a Blackboard discussion board. For the online component, the instructor posts a question every week that the class debates on. The question from last week was, “Should marijuana be legalized for medicinal use for children?” Then, we talk about the question further in class. I like having the chance to form an opinion on the topic and to find research, if needed, before debating on it verbally. Although we have some disagreements in Honors Crossroads, often times the majority of the class has the same opinion. This contrasts the environment that we have in Fight Club. Because Professor Strickland assigns us a point of view, there is always something to argue. The drawback of this is that if I am assigned the point of view that I do not agree with personally, then my argument will not be as strong. I am a harmony-loving person, so being pushed to argue has brought me out of my comfort zone. Overall, being thrown into argumentative situations has allowed me to become a better critical thinker. I am still familiarizing myself with being confrontational in a debate situation; so hopefully by the end of the semester I will have won at least a few Fight Clubs.

*****

After participating in Fight Club for a few weeks, my skills at arguing have developed. I still see arguments in my life. Recently I have argued a bit with my roommate. It's never a heated screaming match but we do have disagreements from time to time. One example is she wanted to use a new air freshener but I didn't like the scent she chose. I also argue when I am working on a project in a group. Again, the arguments are not aggressive. The "fights" in my life tend to be softer probably because of my personality. 

Since I am not inclined to argue with people I have struggled with doing fight club in class. However, as we are nearing the end of the semester, I can say that I have improved my argumentation on paper and verbally. Writing our research papers has taught me how to convey an effective argument through writing. I have enjoyed fight club recently because I am more comfortable with forming arguments. I know how to spot counter arguments and how to attack those opposing points. Although when I fought with Maddie in front of the class I clearly lost (great job Maddie), I tried my best and that motivated me to do better in subsequent fight clubs. As a result, I have won some debates since then. 

In my other classes we still have discussions. I have found myself playing "Devil's Advocate" frequently in these debates. I think this is because this class has taught me the importance of having strong arguments that address potential naysayers. In Honors Crossroads we discussed ethical healthcare scenarios. Those were difficult to choose a side for since there are many drawbacks and benefits to each side. The class was often split in opinion, so we debated with each other over what the doctor should do in each situation. 

Overall at SLU this semester, being forced to pick sides and argue for that viewpoint has made me a more decisive person.